Paying for experience

Well, I did it. I picked both a good enough mountain destination, which wound up being way better than good enough and even than the place I had been planning to go, aaaaand, paying money to play through some tough levels in Candy Crush.

And I went back to enjoying the game and having it help me through those middle-of-the-night moments when my reflux is acting up and I just need to wait it out until I can fall asleep again. I also got better at the game. Something dislodged with the $0.99 and left me much further than I would have been otherwise. Hopefully I'll be able to take this with me somehow on the day I give birth (however it happens) to my son. That sometimes you have to go in the direction you are most dismissive of in order to get further down the road you want to be on. It is okay to compromise, and not to wait to do it until the last possible second when the ship is already sunk.

I'm also still struggling with this in regards to my kid. Who does not like to share. Especially not food. Speaking for our nuclear family, I get it. But I also know how ashamed I feel, in the face of a giving child or family, when I my kid pulls back and tries to hide her food. And I need to be okay with her reaction. I can explain why it is nice to share, and why it is good to share, but I need to let her figure this stuff out on her own. She often actually will share, but later, once the other child's request is over and she doesn't feel pressured. Kind of like me, when she comes up to the countertop where I'm making dinner and grabs for something. I guess neither of us responds well to grabbers, and we often need a moment to adjust. We need to not feel ambushed. Not sure why that is, but also it shouldn't matter so much that I need to stop her by any means I can from reacting the way she does. I need to trust her reaction and trust that she'll finesse it eventually and still have friends left at the end of the day.

Anyway, compromise is the word of the day around here. Not sure I can practice it yet, sure I don't like it, but know I want to try.