The judgemental old ladies on the bus, go "tsk, tsk, tsk,..."

Currently, A is singing a lot. Swiss German songs from daycare, the ABC song from (I guess) the Fish School app on the iPhone, and now The Wheels on the Bus. Each verse has great little hand gestures, and it repeats well, and no wonder kids like it. Good stuff.

And, heck, we ride the bus a lot. The wheels on those buses go round and round. The doors go open and shut. The driver, however, does not say "move on back", or even the Swiss German version, and sometimes we wish he did. And the people on the bus, instead of going "up and down", kind of get flung forward and backwards, sometimes landing on the floor during a particularly, um, enthusiastic application of either accelerator or brakes.

And there is a characteristically Swiss verse to "the Bus" song here, that keeps getting my goat. See title of this post.

Twice now, in the last two weeks, as A and I have been riding public transport to a birthday party, once in matching puppy outfits, once in plainclothes, the 60 and over age group ladies have decided to fix their disapproving gazes, curled sneering noses and lips, and shaking heads on us. The first time, when A and I were in puppy outfits, and looked pretty home made, cute, non-Halloweenish, A on my back, I went from smiling on the outside and inside, to barely smiling at the b)(*#&$ on the outside. People here judge you a lot.

Yes, they judge you everywhere. But in India, I knew I didn't fit it, and that just my lighter colored hair meant I was going to be stared at. In Chicago, they know better than to show it lest a "oh no you di'nt" altercation starts up, and my British friends tell me that although you are judging left and right you never, ever, show it on your face and you may even apologize or smile for nothing in the direction of the one you are judging.

Here, they put on their nasty face, shake their head, stare, and sometimes even wag a finger.

So it happened again last weekend, the second incident, when we were not in costume, and this time it was two ladies. I assumed it wasn't us they were looking at at first. But when we got off the tram, they were still staring (this part still amazes me), and when I smiled at them, they just stared back. This time, I was ready for more action. As the tram pulled away, I raised my eyebrows, kept smiling, and waved at them. And kept my inner smile.

It sort of redefined that first incident for me, too. Of course it is them, and not me. And since people so openly judge you here for their version of right and wrong, one day you get told off for having the dog off leash on the walk near the house, and the next, for having her off leash. On the same walk.

Still, it would be nice to have some more ammunition (not the metal, live kind, as one of my Facebook friends suggested, tongue in cheek, that he would lift his jacket and show them his piece). Like some things to say. And a particularly vexing way (to the perp) to say them. My friend L, who was over for a playdate with his daughter yesterday, and is Swiss, recounted his approach to some people on a train once. I think he is self-possessed, and not flustered, enough, to handle these things well. Or at least in a way I would like to. So I've decided there should be an iPhone app, where we come up with the most common 100 finger-wagging situations you encounter here, that he can record a slightly shaming, but smiling, video response to, and the app user can play them in the direction of the disgusted party. We could name it "L tells you off, in Swiss German."