Argh! I even had to retype the title because my German keyboard has z and y switched. It first said "Saz what?" Maybe that would be a better title for this entry, anyway.
It is Monday, midday, here in Europe. I came into work to have another fresh-faced go at the work thing, and made a point of going to my group's coffee hour, at the Physics cafeteria at 10:30am, even though I was going to have my first German class (in post-beginners' German) shortly afterwards. I went, it was quiet, with only 3 of us there, I tried to ask a few questions to liven things up, about people's weekends. A few more people came. Someone who had just been speaking with me in English switched to German. And so went the rest of the 30 min, as others came for coffee.
Oh, such good practice for you, to have to speak in German, someone might say. Up yours, I might reply. I am already a bit lonely at work. I spend a lot of time working on my own. No one seems interested in a journal club up here. I'm tired. And conversation isn't flowing as things stand, even in English.
Yes, that is a bit bitchy. In reality, though, I'm trying to participate in my group's activities, and to have to strain to listen in on conversations, to be the only woman whether 2 or 10 other groups members show up, when I might catch 20% of what is being said, only to realize that it is a private conversation that was marked early on by some quiet word or two that I missed, is not what makes a Monday easier. I kind of just wanted to move back to the US this morning around 11am.
Ironically, my German class was 50% women, with a talkative, very approachable female instructor, and I had a great 1 1-2 hours speaking German with people not from work. As long as I remember to get a sandwich or lunch just before class, I think this is going to go well. As for work, maybe I'll just start an online journal club.
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When I was in Munich for 3 mo., some of the loneliest times were when everyone around me would break into German and keep the conversation in German. There was also a gaggle of English-speaking Portuguese friends at work I'd eat lunch with, and they'd break into Portuguese. After a few weeks of breaking down in tears at the culture shock after work alone in my room --- I decided to just speak up and say politely, "Oh, hey, guys? Yeah, I kinda feel left out b/c I can't understand what you are saying --- do you mind speaking in English?" They were all fluent in English, btw, but just didn't have enough sensitivity to realize they were leaving me out. Once I spoke up, it got better - one of them would break into German or Portuguese and then someone else would be like, "English!"
ReplyDeleteThere was one very awkward lunch though, where in the middle of their conversation in Portuguese, I just got up and left. They all looked at me and one said, "What? Where are you going? You don't agree or something?" and in a very flat tone said, "I don't agree or disagree, I can't understand anything when you talk in Portuguese." and turned and walked away. I didn't eat lunch with them til the next week, and then I spoke up about the whole English-speaker thing.
I also felt strangely "outside of things" on U-Bahn when everyone around me would be speaking in German and I couldn't understand ANY of the chatter. Very strange alone feeling!
So, I hear ya on your situation. If they are also fluent in English, then they are just being rude and you could try saying something...like..."Sorry, my German isn't good yet - can you repeat in English?" a few times maybe? See if they get it? But like, if they are (1) German (2) scientists and (3) men --- chances are they just won't pick up on it and something more straightforward has to be said. Or --- are you closer with any of them that can speak up on your behalf?